THE LAST SONG OF THE SWAN

Hi friends,

I am a blessed soul. I have a wonderful family. My wife is lovable, attentive, understanding and cooperative. My children love, respect and worship me. They are well settled in life. My SIL and DIL are the best. The three grandchildren make life a paradise.  

My family is like a car,  my daughter is the engine, my son is petrol and we are the drivers. We have a lot of love, understanding, concern and care among ourselves. I live for the happiness of my wife and children. I imagine how nice it would be if I have nine children like my father. 

I lived a near-perfect life. I never harmed anyone, never walked on the wrong path, never failed to do my duty and always helped others. I have come up in a hard way. In my Will, my wife will get the inheritance. I have medical insurance for us. My children are friendly with each other. What else I can aspire for in life?

I committed three grave mistakes in life. It was not deliberate. It was due to ignorance. Otherwise, life would have been different. I am able to assess, analyze, judge and criticize myself. To that extent, I am matured. I brood over those mistakes and cry. I will not get another chance to redeem.

I am hearing impaired. I tried a hearing aid. It is of no avail. Long usage gives a headache. Ear lobes get bruises. I can talk to one person if he is close to me and in the frequency suitable for me to hear. I cannot manage the conference. My eyesight is also failing. My stomach is too sensitive.

The sound of a car, the barking of a dog, the crying of a baby, the whistling of the wind, the music on the TV, I can hear nothing. There is only silence everywhere. When a dog barks, I can only see the dog but I do not hear the barking nor feel its ferocity. It is dead for me.

I do not have wild desires. I love reading and writing. I love music. I wish to travel. But health does not permit. Due to physical problems, I have lost interest in everything. For survival, I need a small room, simple food, simple dress and peace of mind. The last one is evading. Where can I get it?

I want to reach my final destination. O' God, Bless me. I need the boarding pass to reach Your Lotus Feet where I can find peace and solace. In normal journey, we gather our luggage eagerly to alight. But in the last journey, there is no destination, no luggage, no eagerness, and on alighting. 

The last song of the swan is a metaphorical phrase for a final gesture, effort or performance given just before dying or retirement or leaving. This term is derived from the legend that, swans sing beautifully and mournfully just before they die, while they are mute during the rest of their lives. MAY GOD BLESS YOU.

FRIEND, IT IS JUST MY DREAM

Hi friends,

I am not an Economist from Stanford or MIT. I am a layman, a pebble on the seashore, a bubble on the whirlpool. That does not mean I should not have any ambitions, wishes, and dreams. I have lived in this great country for 72 years. It is more than 70 years since we got our Independence. We have to go a long way to reach the levels of developed countries. I would like to list out 12 areas where our Govt can initiate steps to improve the standard. I know it may be difficult to implement or it may not be even feasible. FRIEND, IT IS JUST MY DREAM and  I wish to place it before you for your information. They are:

1. EDUCATION: The Govt should provide free education for all people until they wish to study. Education is the backbone of the country. There should be no reservation of any kind. Literacy leads to many benefits. The crime rates, poverty, terrorism, etc. will come down. Good libraries, free of cost, should be opened everywhere for everyone.

2. ROADS: The roads must be developed smooth and hustle free. It must be maintained, top class. Any damage should be rectified within 24 hours without hindrance to the traffic. We have plenty of cement to be used. The person laying the road should be made responsible. This will reduce oil imports considerably, saving foreign exchange.

3. RIVERS: Most of the rivers in our country remain dry for the most part of the year. When the rains come there is flood damaging people and property and the excess water goes into the ocean as waste. Individual states construct dams obstructing the water from going to other states. All the rivers should be interlinked so that there is no suffering due to water shortage.

4. WATER: Most of the villages are suffering a lot due to the non-availability of good drinking water. People drink poor quality water and get all types of diseases. Waterborne diseases are plenty. Poor people are forced to spend a lot of money on medicines. Schemes should be developed to provide uninterrupted good drinking water free of cost to all the villages.

5. AGRICULTURE: There is suicide every day in large numbers by the agriculturists due to poverty, water shortage and failure of crops. Agricultural scientists like Mr. Swaminathan and others should be consulted or entrusted. Drip irrigation, compulsory training should be imparted to all engaged in agriculture. The Govt should cover insurance for crop failure and also fix a minimum price for all agricultural products. It should control the middlemen and should come forward to buy in case of need.

6. SENIOR CITIZENS: The senior citizens are the suffering lot. Their blessing for the country is the need of the hour. When the income for retired Govt servants is linked with the cost of living,  for other senior citizens it gets reduced due to a lower rate of interest on their investments. For them, the rate of interest must be 1% more than others. They should be given free medical treatment and free travel as their children are no longer looking after them. Old age homes should be controlled and made affordable to them.

7. DISCIPLINE: There should be compulsory military service for 2/3 years for all men and willing women after attaining the age of 21. Without this training, there should be no employment for them. This will develop patriotism, discipline, good health, reduction in defense expenses, knowledge of different people, places, languages, culture and above all unity and concern among all people of the country

8. TAXES: The accounting year starts in April. But people pay taxes casually till next March or even later or do not pay at all. Due to this, the income for the Govt gets delayed and also the implementation of schemes. People should voluntarily come forward to pay their taxes. There should be an incentive for people who pay taxes promptly in April. Then tax collections will be made early in the year and it will earn interest also.

9. JUSTICE: Most of the people who want justice spend their entire life in the halls of the courts. Experts are there to get a case postponed life long. Civil cases take generations to get settled. Even then, their problems remain unsolved. The rules should be suitably amended and the courts sufficiently staffed and the cases should be cleared within 3 months maximum.

10. CORRUPTION: There should be no corruption in Govt offices. It is the cancer of the country. It affects the economy in every way. The punishment should be made very severe, like death sentence when caught. All the areas, where the public has to get any benefit or approval, should be made available on line without the need to meet any one in the office.

11. AADHAAR: Aadhaar is a good scheme. It should not go waste. It should be made on par with the Social Security Number in the US. The citizens should be graded A to E, representing very good, good, very fair, fair, and bad. It should be based on their "conduct" as citizens. Any violation of law or any good act done should be recorded and the grade up/downgraded. For all benefits, incentives, concessions, employment etc, the preference should be based in the order of the grades.

12.CINEMA: Cinema industry should be controlled. There is wide disparity in remuneration. While the actors are paid a fortune others get peanut. The Govt should streamline the pay structure by grading all artists with minimum pay, increment and bonus on profits. This will reduce cost of production and ticket rates. In India, people worship the actors like Gods. It is one of the wonders of the world. They are also like other humans without make-up. Kerala shows the ways due to its 100% literacy. People must be educated on these lines.

I PRAY TO GOD TO BLESS THIS GREAT COUNTRY.

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FINDING AN ALLIANCE FOR THE DAUGHTER

Hi friends,

The responsibility of the parents should end when the children get married. The children lose flexibility when they grow old. Adjusting and accepting is important for the success of a marriage. When one is young, he has the tendency to go along with people but in later years he becomes rigid. 

I also experienced difficulties in finding an alliance for my daughter. I would say that getting the son married is more difficult than a daughter. Because we know about our daughter but we do not know anything about the daughter-in-law.

My daughter is fair, beautiful, intelligent, well educated and well mannered. She wanted to help me until my son finished his education. But we decided to conduct her marriage at the age of 21. We did not prefer foreign boys. We preferred engineers as my daughter is an engineer.

The first alliance was from Coimbatore. His uncle was in Ashok Nagar, Chennai. We invited all our brothers and sisters to attend the girl seeing the ceremony. But only the uncle and his wife came. They regretted and said the boy wanted to study further.

The second alliance was from Hyderabad. He was a Chartered Accountant getting a fabulous salary. His parents saw our daughter and returned without saying a word. On the next day, we went to their house to get their opinion.

Their cousin asked us about the dowry. We did not like the way they started the discussion. We told them, we have not even seen the boy and the boy and the girl have not met and you want to discuss dowry. I said sorry and left the place.

The third one was also a Chartered Accountant. When we went to their house to invite them, we saw a middle-aged woman lying on the floor, reading a magazine. Beside her, a 3-month-old baby, with feces all over its body, was kicking its legs. 

Heads of ladies finger and clothes were strewn all over the place. A bulky man walked across the room without even bothering about us. A fat lady asked us what we wanted. My wife was not interested in. We gave some lame excuse and ran out of the house.

The fourth one was a civil engineer. They had a construction business and the boy studied civil Engg in the US. A Gurkha allowed us to go inside the house after checking with the master. However, we were not in favour of rich people.

The fifth one was a software Engg in Microsoft. The boy was handsome. We noticed the boy taking a bite from his father's tiffin plate. This gesture showed the understanding between the father and son. 

The parents saw our daughter and took her photo to show it to the boy. The mother was very friendly. After one week, we went to their house to know their stand. The mother said she did not show the photo to her son. 

After a week we went. Again the mother gave the same reply. We went again after another week and the mother had not shown the photo to the son. I got upset and asked her to return the photo and I said  I was not interested.

The mother was so possessive about her son and she was even reluctant to show the photo to him. It is not advisable to give the daughter in marriage to a boy whose mother is possessive about him. The couple cannot lead a peaceful life.

LOVERS EVEN AFTER MARRIAGE

Hi friends,

This morning during my walk, I saw a college-going boy and a girl aged about 18, fair and good looking, coming from the opposite direction, carrying shoulder bags, holding their hands and before crossing me, talking, laughing, giggling, fighting, arguing, slapping, and smiling. Hence this article.

Parents do not consider that their children are matured enough to take an independent decision on marriage. They are unable to digest the fact that their children have taken the decision without even consulting them. So they take it as an insult. Also, they are much worried in case of any eventuality.

Assuming that you are studying in a college, one day after reaching the class you come to know that there is a test. You have not prepared well and with what you have followed in the class, you write the test. You expect 50% but when the mark is announced you get 65%. You are so happy because you got more than you expected.

Assuming the lecturer announces a test before a week, and you prepare day and night and go well prepared. You write the test to your fullest satisfaction and you expect 95%. When the result comes you get the first mark in the class with a score of 85%. Though you got the first mark, you are not happy because you expected 95 but got only 85.

In the first case, you are happy when you got only 65 but you are unhappy when you got 85 in the second case. You are unhappy because you do not get what you expected. Similarly, in an arranged marriage, you do not know anything about the spouse and you have no expectation. You are happy even if you get reasonable satisfaction and you can improve upon it in due course. 

But in love marriage, it is the opposite. You know the person well as you both have moved closely. While making love, the boys do various things to please the girls but they are different after marriage. Mostly the lover turns into a husband which breaks the heart of the girl. If they continue to be LOVERS EVEN AFTER MARRIAGE, then they will ever be happy. 

While I was in college, I received love letters from two girls. I told them that I was not open. I was not mentally strong to face failure and that I believed in love after marriage. Sanctity was important to me. I wanted to be a RAMA to my would-be wife. Even in buses, I stood away from ladies. Of course, I wanted to marry two handicapped girls but there was no love episode. 

According to research, in India arranged marriages are more and love marriages are less for ethical, moral, cultural, traditional, regional, linguistic, communal, economic, and religious reasons. In cosmopolitan and well to do families this concern does not arise due to the money power and the independence of the children.  GOD BLESS YOU.

DETAILS TAKEN FROM GOOGLE: In fact, today up to 90 percent of marriages in India and 60 percent of all marriages in the world are arranged. Divorce rates in India overall are pegged at about 1.2 percent. In India rates of divorce in love marriages are much higher than in arranged marriages. According to a 2012 study by Statistic Brain, the global divorce rate for arranged marriages was 6 percent — a significantly low number. Compared to the 55 percent of marriages in the world that are arranged, this low statistic shows the success rate of arranged marriages.

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KANNAN WEDS GEETHA

Hi friends,

It was 3rd Feb 1974. The most important day of my life. It was my wedding day. On this auspicious day, I married Ms. Geetha, d/o Mr. S.Rangarajan of Srirangam. The function was celebrated in a simple way in their house itself and not in any hall. 

There was no video in those days but only photographs. People did not even know how to smile for the photo. The bride was shy always. I am pleased to present before you the photos taken during the function.

Nowadays people take hundreds of photos for the wedding album. Within a short time, they forget about it. For my wedding in 1974, only 16 photos were taken. That is the economy. I am still preserving them

இப்போதெல்லாம் கல்யாண ஆல்பததில் நூற்றுக் கணக்கான போட்டோக்கள் ஓட்டுவது வழக்கம். சில நாட்களில் அவை இருக்கும் இடமே தெரியாது. 1974 இல் எனது திருமணத்தில் எடுத்த போட்டோக்கள் மொத்தமே பதினாறு போட்டோக்கள் தான். அதுதான் சிக்கனம். அவைகளை நான் இன்னமும் பாதுகாத்து வைத்திருக்கிறேன். 

A BIG THANK YOU FOR VIEWING.

THE MOTHER IS LIKE A ROSE

Hi friends,

Aging is a natural process. My mother is no exception. She has also gone old. She is 91 plus fragile, greyish hair, shrunken skin, brownish eyes, withered teeth, unable to stand erect, bent at the waist level, always looking at the floor, depending on walkers to move, confined within four walls and bedridden. 

These are the symptoms of aging. Even then she is my mother. I love her so deep. A rose is always a rose. You look at a rose. You will not like to take your eyes off it. THE MOTHER IS LIKE A ROSE and you will not like to take your eyes off her. She is the same mother who took care of me and my children years ago.

She used to sing lullabies when my children were young. I wondered at her melodious voice. She had not learned music from any guru. She was her own guru. Over a period, she had learned Carnatic and folk songs. We are six brothers and three sisters. Whenever we gather around her to make her happy, she used to share everything with us. Even at this age, she sings for us. 

People who have learned music used to appreciate the sruthi she maintains, breath control at this age and her passion for music. Would you like to hear her singing? Here she goes. It is a folk song listing out the various dishes served in the feast of the wedding of Valsala, daughter of Balaram, brother of Sri Krishna, with Abimanyu, son of Arjuna in Mahabharat. 

LET US LAUGH IT OUT

Hi friends, 

To "Laugh" is medicine without side effects. It keeps you in high spirits. It removes your stress and strain. It makes you forget your worries. In Yoga, there is an exercise to laugh out. It is artificial. But jokes are natural. Shall we laugh it out?

CALLS  TO  911

1. Dispatcher: 9-1-1. What is your emergency?

Caller: I heard sounds like gunshots from the last house in the corner.

Dispatcher: Do you have an address?

Caller: No, I have a blouse and slacks. why?

2. Dispatcher: 9-1-1. What is your emergency?

Caller: I am trying to reach nine eleven but my phone does not have an eleven on it.

Dispatcher: This is nine eleven

Caller: I thought you just said nine-one-one

Dispatcher: Yes, madam nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same things.

Caller: Friend, I may be old but I am not stupid.

3. Dispatcher: 9-1-1. What is the nature of your emergency?

Caller: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are very frequent.

Dispatcher: Is this her first child?

Caller: No. You idiot! This is her husband.

4. Dispatcher: 9-1-1.

Caller: I am having trouble breathing. I am out of breath, I think I am going to pass out.

Dispatcher: Sir, where are you calling from?

Caller: I am at a payphone. In the north street.

Dispatcher: Sir, An ambulance is on the way. Are you asthmatic?

Caller: No.

Dispatcher: What were you doing before you started having trouble breathing?

Caller: Running from the police.

QUOTES:

5. Bus stops in the bus stand.

Auto stops in auto stand

Cycle stops in the cycle stand

Does mosquito stops in mosquito stand?

6. You have water in tender coconut.

You have water in the earth

You cannot use a bore but only a straw in the coconut.

You cannot use a straw but only a bore in the earth.

7. There are many cells in the body

But you cannot put a Sim card in any.

8. If you take a sleeping tablet,  you get to sleep but,

If you take cough medicine,  you don't get cough

9. If you get tooth pain you can remove the tooth.

But if you get leg pain, you can't remove the leg

Nor if you get headache you cannot remove the head.

10. Ishwarya Roy may be a great actor. 

If she drives a Hero Honda,

it is only a Hero Honda, and 

it will not a Heroine Honda.

11. Whatever the efforts it takes, and

whatever the speed it goes, the 

the back wheel cannot overtake

the front wheel.

12. A husband-wife were talking to each other.

WIFE: People say a husband and wife cannot live together in heaven. Is it true?

HUSBAND: That is why it is called heaven.

MAY GOD BLESS YOU.

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TWO THINGS WE NEED THE MOST

Hi friends,

Both health and wealth are cousins. Wealth is needed to live and health is to enjoy the fruits of wealth. Bad health takes away wealth. We work hard to get wealth but we fail to take care of our health. Health is inherited and depends on our lifestyle. We have to design our lifestyle to stay healthy. 

Health issues do not surface until we are 40. Thereafter, it appears one by one. The most important issue is the weight. It must be as per BMI [body mass index]. The formula is [ Bodyweight in kgs divided by height in meters squared. Underweight below 18.5 kg/m2. normal weight 18.5 to 25, overweight 25 to 30, obese over 30 ].  

Excess carbo is converted into fat. Saturated fat is bad. Sugar and salt should be limited. Fruits, vegetables, curd and buttermilk to be consumed more. 6 to 8 glasses of water to be taken daily. Coffee or tea to be curtailed. Soft drinks and bakery products to be avoided. Snacks should be occasional. Eat at a fixed time.

Walking and cycling are good exercises. Walk 30 minutes daily. Learn exercises and Yoga. Take a bath twice daily. Meditation relieves stress. Tobacco products or alcohol to be forbidden. Listen to good music. It relieves stress. 

Play with children and talk to parents and inquire about their health. Be away from work once in 4 months. Have a balanced approach to life. Do not get tension or agitated or anger. Avoid arguments and confrontation. Respect other's views. 

Have a normal sex life. Do breathing exercise. Inhale through one side of the nose and release through the other side. Early to bed and early to rise make a man healthy wealthy and wise. Get up from bed at 5 AM and go to bed by 10 PM. 

Believe in God and do the duty. Once a year, have a medical check-up. Spend judiciously and save for the rainy day. Housing, medical expenses, insurance, education, and retired life are to be taken care of. It gives peace of mind and better health.   

Self-medication is bad. You should always consult a doctor. Taking antibiotics affects vital organs. Antibiotics destroy good bacteria. We should try to enhance resistance power. For serious ailments involving the heart, lungs, liver, kidney, and brain, we must go to the specialists. MAY GOD BLESS YOU.

THE SCAR THAT WILL NEVER FADE

Hi friends, 

The wedding is over. The girl's parents are fully satisfied with the way the wedding is conducted. The satisfaction of having given the daughter to a suitable boy removes all the stress and strain but the feeling of separation of the daughter remains.

After every marriage, it is the wish of every parent that they should become a grandparent. After a few months, they hear the news that their daughter has conceived. Their joy knew no bounds as they are going to become grandparents. Then the girl is sent to her parents for safe delivery of the child.

Why is she sent to her mother? According to my opinion, the girl's father is only a custodian. The girl is sent to her mother purely for rest. It is not advisable for her to be with the in-laws and her husband during the last two months before delivery and the first three months after delivery. I wish to write about my personal experience.

My first son was born in 1974. He was fair, hale, and healthy and weighed 3.5 Kgs. My in-laws had arranged a midwife for the delivery in their house itself. Unfortunately, the baby had swallowed some fluid, developed a respiratory problem, and died within a few hours. Bad news. All our dreams, expectation, happiness, and suffering had gone to waste.

A doctor would have sucked the fluid and the baby would be alive. I would not have lost my son. If he is alive today,  he might be 42 and giving me wonderful support at this old age. It is fate. It is destined that I should lose my first son. Every now and then, I think about him. Then I console myself. It is a permanent SCAR THAT WILL NEVER FADE.

After 25 years in 1997, my daughter came for her first delivery. Thoughts about losing my first child came into my mind. I resolved that everything should be done to avoid any eventuality and to take maximum care of her. I wanted my daughter to have normal delivery as it is safe and healthy for the mother and baby. It is less expensive also. 

Hence, I visited lady doctors in  Senthil Nursing Home, Sundaram Medical Foundation, Vijaya Hospital, GG Hospital, Dr. Lakshmi clinic, Devaki Hospital, St.Isabel's Hospital, Kalyani Hospital, and finally EVK Nursing Home in Chennai. I discussed with all doctors and wanted their assurance for normal delivery. No one was willing to give assurance.

Dr. Uma Ram of EVK Nursing Home gave the assurance. She was the one to advise my daughter to undergo a Down's Syndrome test. Though it was far from my house, we went there for all check-ups, and finally, she had a normal delivery. The same doctor looked after the delivery of my second grandson and first granddaughter which were all normal deliveries. Thank you.

WHOSE RESPONSIBILITY IS IT?

Hi, friends,

There are four divisions in the ruling of the country. They are:

1.The Legislature makes the law

2.The Administration executes the law

3.The Judiciary supervises the execution of the law.

4.The Media is the watchdog.

The general public is employed in every one of the above as well as they are outside also. If everyone attends to their business and allows the system to run as per law then there will be smooth functioning of the system and there will be NO corruption. 70 years ago it was like that and there was no black money.

Generally, Judiciary and Media are considered to be corrupt-free. Only the legislature and administration are considered to be corrupt. The administration is the major source of corruption helped by the legislature. Both of them go hand in glove.

1. The general public, when they want to get anything to be done early by the govt. without waiting for the normal time, they bribe the administrator. There enters cancer called corruption. By getting it done early they could make more money.

2. The general public consists of rich/poor, educated/uneducated, employed/unemployed, business/nonbusiness, professional/nonprofessional. Their income varies from person to person. If they consider what they earn/get is what they DESERVE then there is no problem. They will work hard to earn more.

Instead, they want to LIVE THE LIFE of the more fortunate. There enters cancer. They need more money and they become GREEDY. They want to make easy money and corruption grows.

If the general public [ you and I ] lead a perfectly normal life within our income as advised by our forefathers there will not be any corruption in our country.  MAY GOD BLESS YOU.

MOTHER OR WIFE?

Hi friends,

For some people, the mother is important. For some, the wife is important. For some, both are important. Funny things happen in our life. We remember some and we forget most of them. An interesting incident happened in our family when I was just ten and my father was 39.

My father had lost his father when he was 11. He was brought up by his mother. She had six children of whom my father was the last. She was very strict, orthodox, tonsured her head after the death of her husband, wore only a white saree, did pooja and Japam daily. 

No one should physically touch her until she finished her daily rituals. My father had a lot of love, affection, respect, and regard for his mother. To make her happy was one of his ambitions in life. He never failed to do anything to please her.

Taking this to her advantage, my grandmother used to complain about everyone in the family who did not dance to her tunes and got punishment for them. My father never ate anything outside and when he returned home from the office he was hungry as well as angry. 

The grandmother complained only about his return from the office so that the punishment was severe. One day my mother became the victim. When the grandmother complained about her, my father got furious, took a stick, held my mother at her wrist, pulled her inside the bedroom, closed the doors, and started thrashing her. 

All the children were bewildered and cursed the grandmother. My mother was screaming inside the bedroom and my father was shouting furiously. After some time, both of them came out. My mother quietly went inside the kitchen and my father threw the stick on the floor and sat on the sofa looking tired. 

At that time, you know what my grandmother said, "Dey Nana if you hit the pillow hard it would tear away. I know this trick. Your father had done this to me so many times. You can't fool me around". My father was both a devoted son as well as a loving husband.

THE DIFFICULTIES IN WRITING

Hi friends,

Please take a piece of paper and try writing a few lines in any language on your own. Then only you will understand the difficulties in writing. It is not as easy as everyone thinks. A lot of effort is to be put in to be a successful writer. Only the wearer knows where the shoe pinches.

To begin with, I have to arrive at a concept that is of interest to the reader. It may take time. I have to think until the plot germinates. Then I develop it into a write-up in my mind. I start typing the draft. The words must flow. I am not an expert in typing. It takes time. My eyesight is also failing.

The real work begins only after the draft is ready. First, I have to look at the narration. The narration should flow in order. Then paraphrasing. It should be divided into paragraphs for the reader to find it easy while reading. Then I have to design the passage. ie shortening or lengthening wherever it is necessary.

Then comes the grammar. If it is grammatically wrong the reader may not appreciate it. Usage of the language is more important. Proper words should be used in proper places. The beauty of the language lies in the usage of words. Using bombastic words may not win the reader. A simple language is always liked.

After attending to all these aspects, the draft is checked for spelling mistakes. Then the first copy is run. It is checked again and again. A good writer will always find corrections to be made every time. He won't be satisfied. That is the beauty of writing. He never gets satisfied with his own work and feels it can still be improved.

It also gives more insights into a better understanding of the language, A writer should also be a good reader. Grammar, vocabulary, sentence formation, sequential flow of ideas, analysis of target readers, and holding on to the concepts are some of the aspects that play a key role in making a good article.

Writing an article is like delivering a baby. For a short article, it takes about three hours. For a longer one, it takes about 6 to 7 hours. For writing a book it takes months. A writer suffers a lot to bring out his product. I am not a professional writer. I scribble something​ ​that occurs to my mind​,​ not with any intention of educating others. I am a novice and I write ​as a pastime.

You are welcome to read my articles and post your​ ​comments, of course​ ​without any disrespectful remarks. With your blessings and support, I am able to reach this level. Therefore, I request your support by "liking" and "sharing" my articles with your friends. Otherwise, I have no other alternative but to stop writing. Thank you all once again. MAY GOD BLESS YOU.

YOUR CHILD MAKES YOU HAPPY

Hi friends,

Only the children make their parents.  They are created by God. They are innocent, timid, immature, friendly, and adorable. Children will remove all our stress. Everyone has a way to bring up his child. The child has to grow physically, mentally, and intellectually. It will take time and you will have to be patient. Once you are successful in bringing up your child on the right track, you will be happy forever.

1. NO BEATING THE KIDS: If you beat your child for their mistakes you are not human. It will only develop a revenge attitude in the child and wait for the opportune time to give it back to you. Once it grows stronger than you, it will start beating you. Much lower-level parents are suffering due to this.

2. TALK TO THEM: The secret lies in the way how you talk to your kids. The children take everything literally and the way you talk to them goes a long way in building their personalities. As a parent, sometimes we say things that we don't really mean, but the damage has already been done.

3. YOU ARE A BAD CHILD: Negative talks kill self-esteem. They are innocent and believe in goodness. Tell them to be good. Explain what is bad and how it hurts others. Tell them that they are the best and they will love you and will never let you down. Teach them right and wrong and to value good things.

4. SAY NO TO "NO": No is rejection. It is too harsh. They don't expect it from you. They lose confidence in you. Instead of saying a blunt no give them options to choose. Put it in pleasant words to make them understand and love you. At the same time, it is your responsibility to see that they are not spoiled.

5. DON'T TALK TO ME: Most people think that the child will obey if they say "don't talk to me" You are only closing the communication. You are not educating them. They are not grown-ups like you. Allow them to share with you. Tell them the importance. Convince with your words, tone and actions. Keep talking till they buy your point. You may keep a sad face and they will come to you.

6. NO COMPARISON: Never compare with others especially with another brother or sister or friend. This will never give any positive result. They only become jealous and start disliking the sibling. They feel dejected and lose confidence in themselves.

7. LEAVE ME ALONE: You may be busy. But the kid won't understand it. He may like your company and to be with you. You are everything to your child. Never ask them to leave you. Be patient and explain to them how you are busy and when you will be free. Share with them and make them understand that you are busy and how important it is for you.

8. I DON'T LIKE YOU: A child is not born as a problem child. They are replica of the parents. They learn maximum from you. They also learn from family, friends, and surroundings. If the children are problematic blame yourself. For problematic children, parents should be more patient and understanding.

9. "YOU CAN'T DO THIS": This is pure discouragement. Some children may like to do something but they may not be able to do it. It may be due to physical or intellectual inability. Just give them more chances. Or you may even join with them and do it together until they are capable of doing it by themselves. Otherwise, they will never take the initiative.

10. ONLY GIRLS/BOYS DO THAT: This is gender bias. Anyone can do anything. They are only learning. Do not stop them from exploring things. If a boy likes to help his mother to cut vegetables encourage him. Similarly for girls. Knowledge is important and that is real growth. Otherwise, it is only physical growth that is of no value in life.

11. I WILL REPORT TO DADDY:  It instills anxiety and fear in the child. It shows you are incapable of handling the situation. The kid might have done something unintentionally or irresponsibly. If you want to report to your spouse, ask the kid about his opinion and if he is willing to go with you, do not threaten him by referring to daddy. The point is, the kid should understand his mistake.

12. ONLY KIDS DO THIS: Your child may be a grown-up one. Out of enthusiasm, he may do something. Don't say that only kids do it and not grown-ups like you. Please understand he gets some pleasure out of it. You may even join him. If he jumps with joy for something, instead of chiding him, you may also join with him and jump.

13. MORE CARE FOR THE GIRL: The girls are different anatomically, physically, mentally, intellectually, emotionally, and psychologically. At the opportune time, it is for her mother [and not the father] to teach her the nuances of living the life of a girl. There is no point in repenting later.

14. FINAL POINT: Many people are praying to God to give them a child. You are the blessed one. You must view the child, not as an adult. The ultimate goal is not in its intellectual brilliance. It is how much the child loves you, adores you, likes to be with you. You must make the child love you till your end. That is a success.

COMMENTS

Vijayalakshmi B	5:08 PM (14 hours ago)
to me

The article is nice. I think you can publish it.  In modern days, most of the young parents follow most of the things mentioned by you. 

But they may also have different opinions, beliefs, and their own practice, in their day-to-day life,on certain situations.. If they want, they may pick up something from yours if they believe in it, and it may help them.

Viji

Gowri Ramkumar	8:53 AM (1 hour ago)
to me

Dear Mama,

Thanks for sharing.

The points are all good.  Most parents of today are overly protective and over-attentive to their kids.  They don't want to hurt the kids in any way and give the kids everything they want even before they ask.  

Nevertheless, all the points are good.  

I will also take some of the points that you mention and will incorporate in my life as well.

Lots of love,

Gowri

Vidya Anand	11:09 AM (31 minutes ago)
to me

Dear Mama,

The article is a very informative and practical approach to bringing up children.

Though some are difficult to follow...mostly because I am impatient...I will try to do most of it. Many a time I resolve to change myself but it lasts for a short while.

Thanks for sharing it with me. You should probably pick a nice topic, write a book and get it published.

Hope your tummy is OK nowadays

Warm regards to Manni, Surya Anu, and love to Sahara

Yours affectionately,

Vidhu

INTERNSHIP WITH THE INTERNET.

Hi friends,

The Internet has a far-reaching effect on ​daily ​life. At the click of the mouse, one can find ​an​ answer. There is no need to go to the library and refer to books. I learned ​to use ​it myself on my laptop. I wish to share with you how I overcome a physical ailment using the Internet.

​In Chennai, I had​ family doctors. ​In​ Hyderabad, I do not know doctors and also Telugu. I can only go to hospitals. But ​they make me​  undergo various tests costing thousands.  Recently, I spent 4000/ for cold. As I am likely to get ailments due to old age, I decided to refer to the Internet as a trial and for first aid.

For the past 2 to 3 months my stomach has ​become sensitive​. I suffer from indigestion, sulfur burp, bloating, diarrhea, etc. ​It occurs mostly in the night affecting sleep. All home remedies have no effect. I have lost weight also. My digestive system is affected and I do not know what to do. 

I cannot travel, visit people, attend functions, go out with children, eat outside food, and I have to confine myself at home and be content with curd rice. It is very difficult to control oneself when others are enjoying it. They sympathized with me but they cannot ​forego​ food for me.   

I decided to check with the Internet ​for​ a remedy. Our digestive system is controlled by ​bacteria​. The good bacteria help in digestion and the bad ​one ​creates problems. ​The good bacteria control the bad ones to maintain health. Taking antibiotics, destroy the good bacteria ​and ​allow the bad ones to create health issues.

Probiotics contain good bacteria. I took one daily for 10 days. ​W​hen the good bacteria travels through the stomach, half of them get killed due to acidity. Only the rest reaches the colon for digestion

Prebiotics are a better alternative to probiotics. They contain indigestible fibers and helps good bacteria to grow. It withstands the acidity in the stomach. I took one daily for ten days. Digestion improved, diarrhea stopped, bloating disappeared. I develop a hunger and I​ eat​​ better. 

​I request ​doctors not ​to ​mistake me. It is not my intention to bypass them or ignore them. It is only​  learning from the Internet since it is a minor problem. In the case of serious ailments connected with vital organs, I shall not hesitate to go to a doctor​. MAY GOD BLESS YOU.

OUR FAMILY SONG

Hi friends,

You would have heard about the family doctor. Have you heard about a family song? We have a song in our family. We have sung this song for 2 generations. It is a special song. It was nearly 40 years back, in 1976,  when my daughter was born I was on cloud nine. I sang this song to make her sleep. I did not know how to sing then.

Holding her affectionately in both my arms, close to my chest, rocking her comfortably, and making an elephant walk across the room, staring pointedly at her eyes sensing her getting into sleep was a wonderful experience. You get it once in a lifetime.

Somehow I managed because I wanted my daughter to sleep. Though people used to make fun of me, my only concern was my daughter should sleep. I was happy my daughter slept. She did not object to my singing. My wife, who was a good singer also did not object. Then why bother? I was in full flow.

Four years later, in 1980, when my son was born, I sang the same song to make him sleep. He also slept well without any objection to my singing this song. Then 19 years later, in 1999, when my first grandson was born, I sang the same song. He also slept well without showing any disliking. 

Then 5 years later, in 2004, I sang the same song when my second grandson was born. No objection from him also. Then 4 years later, in 2008, I sang the same song when my granddaughter was born. She also did not have any objection.

Five different children at five different times had accepted and loved this song and that too from a nonsinger [novice]. That shows the quality of the song for its lyrics and music lasting 40 years. Hats off to MSV. My wholehearted thanks to him for helping me to make my children sleep. I still have nostalgia for this song. Do you want to listen? Here it is. Enjoy

Actually, he learned this song from his mother

OH, MY HEAD ESCAPED THE AXE

Hi friends,

In 2016, We decided to settle with our son in Hyderabad. We have a house in Chennai. We decided to sell the house and buy another one in Hyderabad. But black money is demanded both at the buying and selling ends. I do not want to lose peace of mind at my old age. I stood firmly rejecting the black money. MY HEAD ESCAPED THE AXE in the demonetization.

Black money is hidden in the form of currency, bullion, jewels, stocks, Benami holding, deposits in foreign banks, etc. The income tax department has to unearth the black money. Demonetization will not totally eradicate black money. It may help in bringing out black money held in the high denomination. 

In Jan 1946, currency notes 1000 and 10000 were withdrawn. In 1954, new notes 1000, 5000, and 10000 were introduced. In Jan 1978, notes of 1000, 5000, and 10000 were demonetized. Now in Nov 2016, there is demonetization. What is the effect? Are we free from black money? No, it is growing every day.

Previously only the super-rich was holding black money. Now everyone is having it. To help them, there are legal experts, chartered accountants, auditors, etc. who can interpret ten meanings for one sentence in the law. For strict enforcement, more staff, more salary, and more taxes will affect the poor.

We have lost our cultural and moral values. Chaos, anarchy, lawlessness, violence, corruption, black money, rape are the order of the day. People are greedy. A rickshaw wallah wants Levy jeans. Another wants BMW. A housewife wants a costly I-phone. Greed originates from the rich and passes on to the poor.

Everyone has a duty and responsibility to the nation and is expected to do it voluntarily. We should claim our rights only after performing our duties. When people fail to do their duty, black money generates. If all citizens pay their taxes voluntarily and lead a perfect life, there will be no black money.

PARAMACHARYA, our guru, had advocated that the rich should lead a simple life. There is a 10% growth in necessities and a 90% growth in luxuries. Our motto should be to go for the necessities, avoid the comforts, and forget the luxuries. MAY GOD BLESS YOU.

THE VICIOUS CYCLE

Hi friends,

It was about 7-30 PM. The father parked his car and entered the house after returning from the office. He removed his shoes, kept the briefcase in his room, went to the restroom, had a french bath, and returned to the dining. He looked very tired. His wife brought him hot coffee. He normally did not take any tiffin after 6 PM as it would affect his dinner at 8 PM.

His son, who was studying in 8th standard slowly entered the living room where his father was sitting. He was hesitating to go near his father. He was pale, scared, and bewildered. Seeing his son reluctant to come near him, he called him passionately to come close to him. He has so much love for the kid.

The son stood his ground and did not move. The mother came and lovingly asked the son what was the matter. She took him near the father. When the father asked him what was the matter, the son slowly stretched his progress report for his signature. The father saw the marks which were all in single digits. 

His wife was speechless on seeing the marks. He became furious and brought the cane to thrash him all over. Knowing her husband was short-tempered, she stood in between them. His heart was broken to pieces and the thought of the huge money spent on his school fees etc. further broke him down. 

The father stood spellbound for a few minutes, then dropped the cane and rushed to the front room where his father was bedridden due to old age and was recuperating. He stood there in silence staring at his father for a few minutes and then suddenly fell flat over his father's feet and started crying uncontrollably.

Just then, he remembered how his father talked to him patiently, with loving and passionate words, when he scored poor marks in his 8th std and motivated him to score more marks. The old man was now surprised why his son was crying before him. MAY GOD BLESS YOU.