JOKES IN ENGLISH 1 TO 10

1. Doctor: Which soap do you use?

Patient: K. P. Namboodiri's soap.

Doctor: Paste?

Patient: K. P. Namboodiri's paste

Doctor: Shampoo?

Patient: - K. P. Namboodiri's shampoo.

Doctor: Is K.P. Namboodiri an international brand?

Patient: No. K. P. Namboodiri is my Roommate!

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2. A bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman – “Which book has helped you most in your life?”

The woman replied – “My husband’s Chequebook !!”

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3. A prospective husband in a book store “Do you have a book called, ‘Husband – the Master of the House?

Sales Girl: “Sir, Fiction and Comics are on the 1st floor.

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4. Someone asked an old man : 

“Even after 70 years, you still call your wife "Darling, Honey, Love". What’s the secret?

Old man: I forgot her name and I’m scared to ask her.

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5. A man in Hell asked the Devil: Can I make a call to my Wife?

After making the call,  he asked how much to pay.

Devil: Nothing. Hell to hell is Free.

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6. Husband to wife, "Today is a fine day"

The next day he says: Today is a fine day. 

Again the next day, he says the same thing.

Finally, after a week, the wife can’t take it and asks her husband – since last one week, you are saying this “Today is a fine day. I am fed up. What’s the matter?

Husband: Last week when we had an argument, you said, “I will  leave you one fine day.” I was just trying to remind you.

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7. An argument between a British and an Indian.

British: we spoiled ur motherland for 200 yrs. hahaha.

Indian: We are spoiling your mother tongue daily. hahaha.

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8. Teacher - What is the full form of MATHS?

Student- Mentally Affected Teacher Harassing Student.

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9. Student in computer exam.

Examiner- what is Microsoft excel?

Student - I think it is a new brand of Surf Excel to clean the computer...

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10. A man asked his friend,

"Why Narendra Modi goes walking in the evening, and not in the morning". The friend replied ''Brother,  Modi is PM, not AM'

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