Hi friends,
"The best way to write an autobiography is to treat your life as an interesting story. Starting from birth enhance the story's appeal as you take the reader through the different stages of your life. Both biography and autobiography tell the story of an individual person's life."
The quality of the pudding is in the eating. The quality of life is in the living. Biography should be an inspiration to do good or a warning not to do bad. This is simply a narration of my life and I do not intend hurting anybody by mentioning about unhappy incidents in my life. I confirm that whatever mentioned here are only the truth and nothing but the truth. I am writing this in June 2016. I am 71, and I thought I should write my biography before it is too late. Though I am an ordinary person, I write this for my close people to know about me and about the trials and tribulations in my life.
INTRODUCTION:
I was born on 19th April 1945 in Valady village in Tiruchy district. The corresponding Tamil year/month was Parthiba/chithirai and my birth star was Punarvasu. My father is Mr.T.S.Narayanaswamy and my mother is Ms.Rajalakshmi. My father belongs to Thinniyam village near Lalgudi and mother belongs to Valady.
I was christened Krishnamurthy and called Kannan as I was mischievous. We are six brothers and three sisters. I remember about my life only after I was 5. When my father admitted me in school, he had given my date of birth as 10th Jan. Hence I have two dates of birth, one official and one real.
PART- 1: FIRST 21 YEARS FROM 1945 TO 1966.
When I reached the age of 5, I was admitted by my grandfather in a local school in our village in 1st standard. The school was from 9 AM to 12 noon. I went to the school with a slate made of thin cuddappah stone and a chalk pencil. There were no note-books, books, lead pencil, pen, eraser, water bottle, shoe/socks, uniform, tiffin-box etc. There were only 3 subjects, English, Tamil and Maths. The teacher would write English/Tamil alphabets and numbers on the blackboard, which I had to re-write on my slate. He would then put a tick mark which I showed to my grandparents. They appreciated me sky high and told their neighbours how intelligent I was then. I had lot of time in the evening to play. We had two cows in our house. The Konar came in the evening to milk the cows. My grandmother would give me a large tumbler of fresh milk. Since there was no electricity, we used only kerosene lamps in the night.
After the dinner, I sat on the lap of my grandparents on the front yard under the moon light in a cot made of coir rope. There was no mosquitoes then. My grandparents told me stories from Mahabharata, and Ramayana. My grandfather taught me Maths and Tamil. It was always oral and memorizing type. First, he taught Numbers from 1 to 100. Then, Tables from one to ten. I had to repeat what he told me. He would ask me to repeat it everyday. From 1 Table, he would move on till we reached 10. He also taught me 1/2, 1/4, 1/8, 1/16 tables.Then, he would take up Tamil. He would start with 7 days of the week, 12 English months, 12 Tamil months with its corresponding Sanskrit equivalent, [eg. chithirai-mesham], and the 60 years, the 27 stars in Sanskrit. This coaching was about an hour everyday. While repeating what he said, slowly I fell into sleep on their lap. Then they would put me on to the pillow and covered me with a blanket.I have written an article in my blog about this in my blog under the caption
In 1951, When I was 6, I was in Manimuthar Dam in Tirunelveli district. My father was working as Head Draftsman in P.W.D in the construction of the dam. It was constructed on the river Manimuthar. The water in the river was very tasty and it was supposed to be the best in Tamil Nadu. I was then studying in 2nd std in Thilak Vidyalaya High School in Kallidaikurichi nearby. Everyday we went to school in a van provided by the project. My father was given a separate house and I remember the hills behind my house. During nights wild animals roamed in the area and took away domestic pets. It was not safe to go out during the night. I still remember a 15 feet python crossing the road around sunset when one of the passersby fired twice at it with his gun and killed it. Vasumathi, the daughter of an engineer, was my best girl friend. We used to play together. She was fair and beautiful. I missed her for a long time after leaving the place.
Since my father was on transferable job, after an year in 1952, we next came to Periakulam in Madurai district at the commencement of the construction of the Vaigai dam. It was constructed on the river Vaigai. I was studying in Victoria Memorial Board High School or V.M.B.H.S. Opposite to our house was the Hindi Prachar Sabha where I did Prathmic in the evening. Periakulam was separated by a river into North bank and south bank. Incidentally, I came to know later in my life that my son-in-law's mother was from Periakulam.
One day, my one year old sister who was playing in the front yard was missing. We searched for her in many places and it was difficult to identify her as Mottai was done to her at that time. Finally, I could get her from an old Muslim who was holding the baby and was searching for its parents. In our later years, whenever all our brothers and sisters got together, we used to make fun of her saying that she might be a Muslim. It was here, I went to a hotel for the first time with my father. He got me a dosai for 4 annas which was so big and I could eat only half of it.
I remember a freak incident that happened on Deepavali day. My parents with other children had gone to our maternal grandparent's house, leaving me with my paternal grandmother as escort. They had given me Rs.7/ for purchase of crackers. Dresses were already bought. My grandmother told me not to waste the money on crackers which would become charcoal ultimately and advised me to give it to her and she would preserve it for me. I ignored her advice and purchased "Donkey" crackers, famous at that time, for the entire sum. To ensure that none of the crackers failed, we kept it on top of the mud oven in the kitchen after the night work was over.
At around 2 AM in the night, there was a loud explosion and my grandmother woke me up saying Deepavali had dawned and advised me to take oil bath. Suddenly, there was another loud explosion from the kitchen and we could not go near. We then remembered that we forgot to remove the crackers from the oven and in the heat all the crackers got fired up and exploded. My grandmother was scolding me all the time. The entire kitchen was scattered with debris from the crackers, dislocated few vessels and spilled some food items. I was afraid of my father also. I did not have anything to enjoy for Deepavali and sitting in the front yard, I was pathetically looking at my friends next door.
Then, after one year in 1953, we went to Vaigai dam. My father was given an independent house with a bed room, hall, kitchen, dining, bath and service area.. As there was no school, we went to Andipatti, a nearby town, in the project van for our studies. The school was Board High School. I studied there for 3 or 4 years. The school prayer song was "Sangam muzhangum thiru Madurai".The standard of Tamil was very good in Madurai district. I met my best friends Srinivasan, Daniel Surendran, Vasudevan, Thangavelu, and Bose there. Gowri, the engineer's daughter, was my best girl friend. We used to sit together in the van and on her request, I wrote her name on all her books/notebooks since my handwriting was good.
I was studying in 6th form in 1956 when I was 11. I was travelling to the school in a blue colour GMC van both in the morning and evening. One by name, Bose was also coming in the same van. His father was working as constable in the police dept. He was a senior, tall, stout and well built. He was arrogant because his father was a policemen. He never called me by my name but only by my caste name [ Iyer,ஐயரே ] and he belonged to a different community. This annoyed me very much. In spite of many requests, he never listened nor bothered. I was apprehensive whether other students would also start calling me like that.
One day, I complained to my father about him. Without understanding my feeling, he advised me not to move with him and to keep away from him. I told him that he was not my classmate nor my friend nor I moved with him. I also told him that in spite of my requests, he continued to call me by my caste and also about my apprehension that other students would follow suit. My father ignored my complaint. However, Bose never stopped calling me by caste. We again had an argument and he asserted that he would call me only like that and I could do whatever I might like to do.
On that evening, after returning from school, I complained to my mother how much I was mentally disturbed and also wondered why father could not warn him. When my father returned home from office at 7 PM, on my behalf, my mother took up the matter with him during dinner. Then my father asked me where Bose's residence was and I told him the location. After dinner, my father washed his hands, put on his shirt, went out and returned after half an hour. I did not know what happened. On the next day, Bose cajoled me and started calling me by my name and not by my caste name.[ஐயரே] In this connection, I have written an article under the caption I HAVE A NAME
I had visited Theni, Kambam, Bodi, Periakulam and other wonderful places. During holidays we used to go to KARADU where we inscribed our names on the rocks. We swam in the big KENI for hours. We ate KODUKKAPULI and walked all the way back to Vaigai Dam as there was no bus in that route. I still remember the OTHTHAI ADI PULIA MARAM on the way where strong winds collected fine sand on the road. I remember making my first solo journey from there to Valady when I was just 7. I had written a detailed article about it in my blog http:/thinkannote.blogspot.
Srinivasan was a good singer. He used to sing the school prayer song. By birth his left ankle was slightly twisted and was limping. Thangavelu belonged to the backward community and was very friendly. We all used to sit together for our lunch and shared it. I always took curd/sambar rice with vegetables, vasu always brought rava upma and Thangavelu brought Kambu Kali or koozhu, a broth like dish. Seenu was local boy and he went home for lunch. We had varieties everyday and we enjoyed our meal to our heart's content. With great difficulty, I located Seenu recently and visited his place in Madurai. He was a retired Head master with two children. His reception was not good and I did not like to resume the lost friendship.
There was Recreation club at the project and I used to play all games. I was an expert in carrom. Daniel Surendran was my best friend at the project. He was short, bulky, wheatish in complexion and jovial. We were always together. We used to pluck the seat cushion from the school van and made foot ball out of it. We ran a hand-written magazine in Tamil called "KALANJIYAM" and circulated to everyone. His parents were getting milk powder from the US, and whenever I went to their house his mother used to give me a large tumbler of milk. Such a wonderful and affectionate lady. Daniel was a great friend and even now I am searching for him. Can anyone locate him for me? When I went to his house, his mother used to clean the fish for cooking by rubbing it on stone to remove the fills. I would sit near her to observe it. She used to chide me for I was a vegetarian. My father used to take us to Periakulam to see movies and also to Kodaikanal. Whenever I was at home, I took coffee in a flask to my father's office at 3 PM . At that time, he used to translate to me the story of "TARZAN" that was published daily in the last page of The Indian Express. In this connection, I have written an article MY DEAR FRIENDS, I MISS YOU
For some, the mother is important. For some, the wife is important. For some, both are important. Funny things happen in our life. We remember some and we forget most of them. An interesting incident happened in our family when I was ten and my father was 39. That showed the quality of my father. My father had lost his father when he was 11. He was brought up by his mother. She had six children of whom my father was the last. She was very strict, orthodox, tonsured her head after the death of her husband, wore only white saree, did pooja and japam daily. No one should touch her until she finished her daily rituals. So my father had lot of love, affection, respect and regard for his mother. To make her happy was one of his life ambitions. He never failed to do anything to make her happy. Taking this to her advantage, my grandmother used to complain about everyone in the family who did not obey her words and got punishment for them.
My father never ate anything outside and when he returned home from office he was hungry as well as angry. The grandmother made her complaints immediately on his return from office so that the punishment was severe. One day my mother became the victim. When the grandmother complained about her, my father got furious, took a stick, held my mother at her wrist, pulled her inside the bedroom and started thrashing her. All the children were bewildered and cursed the grandmother. My mother was screaming inside. After sometime, both of them came out. My mother quietly went into the kitchen and my father threw the stick and sat on the sofa posing tired. At that time, my grandmother said, "Dey Nana, if you hit the pillow hard it would tear away. I know this trick. Your father had done this for me so many times. You can't fool me around". My father was both a devoted son as well as a loving husband. I have written an article under the caption "MOTHER OR WIFE?
I studied upto 8th Form at Andipatti till 1958, when I was 13. In 1958, for 9th and 10th Form [SSLC] my father wanted me to study at Trichy where the standard was better. So I had to move to my grandparents place in Valady village where my elder brother was already studying.I was admitted in E.R.High School, Tiruchy which was one of best schools. There I suffered a lot to learn English.Andipatti was famous for Tamil and Trichy for English.Other students used to envy my proficiency in Tamil. But it was a pathetic experience in the case of English.I have written a separate article about how much I suffered to Learn English in my blog under the caption "LEARNING A LANGUAGE ". At the end of my 9th form, I remember the famous Srirangam Temple fire accident took place.
I remember an incident involving my elder brother. While we were playing, accidentally my brother's first toe nail hit me in my right eye and there was bleeding from the eye. On seeing the blood from my eye my brother started crying aloud. On hearing his cry, my grand parents came rushing. There was no eye doctor in the village. Fortunately, our family Konar [the man who milked our cows] came there and he suggested a medicine. He went home and brought a rooster. He made a small incision near its claw from where blood started oozing. He applied that blood into my eyes. The next day I was alright.
My grand mother had an younger sister living in North Uthara street at Srirangam. She was very fond of her sister. Her name was Valambal and we called her Chithi. Every now and then grandma would go to her sister's help. We also went with her. We used to play with her children Nagarajan, Krishna, Mahalingam and Pattu. My grandmother's father Sri. Mahalinga Jadavallabar died at that time when he was taking bath in coleroon river. It was a different story when her younger sister usurped all the jewels of their mother. My grandmother, heart broken, terminated the relationship once for all and the connection between the two families got cut off permanently.
I used to travel by local train from Valady to Tiruchy town to go to the school and return. We were playing all types of games in the village. My elder brother was my saviour from stronger boys. My younger brother also joined us later and the three of us spent wonderful time with our grandparents. During harvest time we used to go to the fields to supervise harvesting till the produce was brought home and stored. Our grandparents provided us with all types of sweets and snacks, fresh cow's milk etc. I can never forget the love and affection our grandparents showered on us during that period of our life. Our mother was their only daughter and we enjoyed all their love and care. In later days, we reciprocated it by taking care of them till they breathed their last.
I passed the SSLC exam creditably in first class in April 1960. In those days not many people appeared for the exam. The pass percentage was also less. The results came only in the newspaper. The Tamil daily Dhina Thanthi brought special evening edition for the results. People were mad to get the paper. I was content to see the English paper on the next day. I was not worried about my results. I got 360 [60%] as against the state first of 403[67%] My father was happy that I got good marks. That was the first and last occasion he lifted me on his shoulders. One of my friends, Ramani took Adv. English and Commerce in PUC. I wanted to take Adv.English and Economics which were considered to be the toughest. But my father had different ideas. In his life, he wanted to become an engineer but he could not succeed. Hence he wanted at least his sons to become engineers. After SSLC, we had to study one year PUC and then 4 years BE to become an engineer. In PUC, apart from English and Tamil, you had to take four subjects in Group 111, either for medicine or engg. Getting admission into BE/MBBS was very tough in those days. My elder brother was not successful.
A three year diploma course in Engg, after SSLC, [LME, LEE, LCE]was very popular for getting jobs and my father wanted me to do that. And without my liking, he admitted me in Sheshasayee Institute of Tech in Ariyamangalam which was in a remote place, away from the city. Everyday, I had to walk a long distance to reach the institute and I had to carry the "T" square also. I did not know then that it was a high ranking Institute. Somehow, I did not like the course and the institute and slowly slipped in my standard. I guess now, my father wanted me to complete my studies and support the family as early as possible since another brother and sister had come into family making a total of 8 children.
At a tender age of 15, I could not understand my father's problems and I was irresponsible.Due to disinterest, bad friends came along and my studies were ruined. I failed miserably in the 1st two years. By that time, my father was transferred to Tiruchy and on my pleading that I would study well, he gracefully admitted me in PUC in National college in 1962 and then in B.Com degree in St.Joseph's college in 1963. At this time, my last brother was born making the total to nine children. In those days family planning was considered unethical. I have written articles in my blog under the captions "A DAY TO REMEMBER" and "THE THRILL OF ADOLESCENCE"and"THE COURT AND ME" to describe some incidents during my college days.
As I was interested in joining the Indian Army, I took active interest in the NCC. The only notable event in the college was that I represented the NCC in the Republic Day Parade at New Delhi in 1966. I have written an article under the title"ON THIS DAY IN THAT YEAR 1966" For this, I was away from college during Nov65-Jan66 which affected my studies considerably. However, I came out successful in B.com in April 1966 when I was 21. I now regret to say that from the time I passed SSLC till the time I passed BCom, it was the most miserable period of my life. It was fate. From a boy good at studies, I became a bad boy. I got into bad friends, bad habits and got attracted towards cinema. The notable friends were Raju, Gopal, Chandru, and Radha. We had pledged that we shall remain friends forever. But alas, their wives did not cooperate and our friendship came to an end abruptly after their marriage.
My father never gave pocket money. To meet my expenses on friends and cinema, I went for part-time job in the evening after college. Rev.Fr.Mathias, the Principal, gave me a recommendation letter which I am keeping even now. Later, after 34 years, this letter helped me to get admission for my son in Loyola college, Chennai in 1997. During summer vocations, I worked as book representative. I travelled the entire state and visited all the schools with sample books published by Agasthier Book Depot, Tiruchy. Had I listened to my father's words and studied the 3 year diploma course, as I was up to SSLC, my life would have been different and colourful. But you can't escape FATE. No one can change what God has written on the forehead. Even now, I consider it was the greatest mistake I had committed in my life.
The first 21 years were the most crucial period of one's life as it decided the future. I wasted six years completely. Tears rolled down my eyes. How was I going to face the future? Then, I stepped into the next phase of my life, job hunting. There was no scope of continuing education. I had no other option except to go for job. Unless you had good education, getting jobs was not so easy. No one would be ready to hire you. To get a job one must be good at English and should have an Engg degree or Masters. People used to say "apply apply but no reply."
For people who were not successful in education, joining the Services was the another option. With my credentials in the NCC, I wanted to get into the Indian Army. I applied to the SSB for short service commission. I attended the tests and interview at Bangalore. I got both my palms wounded in the rope climbing test. After sometime, I got their telegram advising me about my selection and to report for medical test. At that time, my parents were not willing to permit me to join the Army.
So, I was going on posting applications with no reply. I became frustrated in life. I became one of the unemployed thousands. I did not know what to do. I was keeping my fingers crossed. My elder brother did his M.Sc, joined P&T, did his Grad.ITE[telecom. Engg]. He was working as engineering supervisor, and was supporting the family. All my six younger brothers and sisters were in school. My last brother was just three. I could not understand the difficulties of my father who was supporting a family of 14 including my parents and 3 grandparents., and I was sitting idle at home, roaming the town with friends and seeing cinemas.
I now feel how much my father would have felt in his heart at that time. I feel ashamed and wholeheartedly repent for all my mistakes. I sincerely feel very sorry for not listening to my father's words then. I have written articles in my blog under the captions "ON THE CENTENARY OF MY FATHER" and "MY MOTHER AND ME" to express how important my parents were to me. I was just wondering when I was to prosper in life. O' God, give me PROSPERITY.
We shall continue in PART TWO.
comments
by Vijay Nurani
Read Bio. I loved the punch line ‘The quality of life is in the living’. I am also April born like you. It is amazing you remember all your friends. Since you told me that you have not shared with very many I was touched and read it right away. There is no better time than today. Kal kare jo aaj, aaj kare jo Ab. Well written and nicely jells as it flows through your forming years. There are resemblances with what my father wrote on his bio. I will humbly disagree with you when you say you wasted your six years. I think life is about experiences. We all did things like bunking lectures and watch movie. But today when I meet my friends, we laugh about it. I did B Sc. In physics and then did my chartered Accountancy. Today I do neither physics nor accounting. But we all do what we feel is important to us. I fell in some stupid infatuation with a girl in 12th grade just after the prelims goofed up my chemistry paper and did not get enough marks for local engineering colleges. That too was an experience I think…Steve Jobs says it, it all manifests somewhere later in life. Serving in military would have been great. I see your love and respect for your parents. That is one unconditional love in life. Keep it coming…….I enjoyed it and if you do not mind I will show it to my father.
"The best way to write an autobiography is to treat your life as an interesting story. Starting from birth enhance the story's appeal as you take the reader through the different stages of your life. Both biography and autobiography tell the story of an individual person's life."
The quality of the pudding is in the eating. The quality of life is in the living. Biography should be an inspiration to do good or a warning not to do bad. This is simply a narration of my life and I do not intend hurting anybody by mentioning about unhappy incidents in my life. I confirm that whatever mentioned here are only the truth and nothing but the truth. I am writing this in June 2016. I am 71, and I thought I should write my biography before it is too late. Though I am an ordinary person, I write this for my close people to know about me and about the trials and tribulations in my life.
INTRODUCTION:
I was born on 19th April 1945 in Valady village in Tiruchy district. The corresponding Tamil year/month was Parthiba/chithirai and my birth star was Punarvasu. My father is Mr.T.S.Narayanaswamy and my mother is Ms.Rajalakshmi. My father belongs to Thinniyam village near Lalgudi and mother belongs to Valady.
I was christened Krishnamurthy and called Kannan as I was mischievous. We are six brothers and three sisters. I remember about my life only after I was 5. When my father admitted me in school, he had given my date of birth as 10th Jan. Hence I have two dates of birth, one official and one real.
PART- 1: FIRST 21 YEARS FROM 1945 TO 1966.
When I reached the age of 5, I was admitted by my grandfather in a local school in our village in 1st standard. The school was from 9 AM to 12 noon. I went to the school with a slate made of thin cuddappah stone and a chalk pencil. There were no note-books, books, lead pencil, pen, eraser, water bottle, shoe/socks, uniform, tiffin-box etc. There were only 3 subjects, English, Tamil and Maths. The teacher would write English/Tamil alphabets and numbers on the blackboard, which I had to re-write on my slate. He would then put a tick mark which I showed to my grandparents. They appreciated me sky high and told their neighbours how intelligent I was then. I had lot of time in the evening to play. We had two cows in our house. The Konar came in the evening to milk the cows. My grandmother would give me a large tumbler of fresh milk. Since there was no electricity, we used only kerosene lamps in the night.
After the dinner, I sat on the lap of my grandparents on the front yard under the moon light in a cot made of coir rope. There was no mosquitoes then. My grandparents told me stories from Mahabharata, and Ramayana. My grandfather taught me Maths and Tamil. It was always oral and memorizing type. First, he taught Numbers from 1 to 100. Then, Tables from one to ten. I had to repeat what he told me. He would ask me to repeat it everyday. From 1 Table, he would move on till we reached 10. He also taught me 1/2, 1/4, 1/8, 1/16 tables.Then, he would take up Tamil. He would start with 7 days of the week, 12 English months, 12 Tamil months with its corresponding Sanskrit equivalent, [eg. chithirai-mesham], and the 60 years, the 27 stars in Sanskrit. This coaching was about an hour everyday. While repeating what he said, slowly I fell into sleep on their lap. Then they would put me on to the pillow and covered me with a blanket.I have written an article in my blog about this in my blog under the caption
In 1951, When I was 6, I was in Manimuthar Dam in Tirunelveli district. My father was working as Head Draftsman in P.W.D in the construction of the dam. It was constructed on the river Manimuthar. The water in the river was very tasty and it was supposed to be the best in Tamil Nadu. I was then studying in 2nd std in Thilak Vidyalaya High School in Kallidaikurichi nearby. Everyday we went to school in a van provided by the project. My father was given a separate house and I remember the hills behind my house. During nights wild animals roamed in the area and took away domestic pets. It was not safe to go out during the night. I still remember a 15 feet python crossing the road around sunset when one of the passersby fired twice at it with his gun and killed it. Vasumathi, the daughter of an engineer, was my best girl friend. We used to play together. She was fair and beautiful. I missed her for a long time after leaving the place.
Since my father was on transferable job, after an year in 1952, we next came to Periakulam in Madurai district at the commencement of the construction of the Vaigai dam. It was constructed on the river Vaigai. I was studying in Victoria Memorial Board High School or V.M.B.H.S. Opposite to our house was the Hindi Prachar Sabha where I did Prathmic in the evening. Periakulam was separated by a river into North bank and south bank. Incidentally, I came to know later in my life that my son-in-law's mother was from Periakulam.
I was 7 then and my next brother was 4 and my first sister was 2 and 2nd sister was about 1. My elder brother who was 11 was staying with our grandparents at Valady. At that time, the movie "Haridas" which ran for more than two years was shown in Jaya theatre. Along with my brother, I went to see the movie taking 8 annas for two tickets. We lost the money on the way and returned home disappointed. My mother gave another 8 annas to see the movie. In one scene, due to a curse by a sage, Haridas's legs got separated at knee level and both fly to a distant place making him a lame man. That scene was long in my memory.
One day, my one year old sister who was playing in the front yard was missing. We searched for her in many places and it was difficult to identify her as Mottai was done to her at that time. Finally, I could get her from an old Muslim who was holding the baby and was searching for its parents. In our later years, whenever all our brothers and sisters got together, we used to make fun of her saying that she might be a Muslim. It was here, I went to a hotel for the first time with my father. He got me a dosai for 4 annas which was so big and I could eat only half of it.
I remember a freak incident that happened on Deepavali day. My parents with other children had gone to our maternal grandparent's house, leaving me with my paternal grandmother as escort. They had given me Rs.7/ for purchase of crackers. Dresses were already bought. My grandmother told me not to waste the money on crackers which would become charcoal ultimately and advised me to give it to her and she would preserve it for me. I ignored her advice and purchased "Donkey" crackers, famous at that time, for the entire sum. To ensure that none of the crackers failed, we kept it on top of the mud oven in the kitchen after the night work was over.
At around 2 AM in the night, there was a loud explosion and my grandmother woke me up saying Deepavali had dawned and advised me to take oil bath. Suddenly, there was another loud explosion from the kitchen and we could not go near. We then remembered that we forgot to remove the crackers from the oven and in the heat all the crackers got fired up and exploded. My grandmother was scolding me all the time. The entire kitchen was scattered with debris from the crackers, dislocated few vessels and spilled some food items. I was afraid of my father also. I did not have anything to enjoy for Deepavali and sitting in the front yard, I was pathetically looking at my friends next door.
Then, after one year in 1953, we went to Vaigai dam. My father was given an independent house with a bed room, hall, kitchen, dining, bath and service area.. As there was no school, we went to Andipatti, a nearby town, in the project van for our studies. The school was Board High School. I studied there for 3 or 4 years. The school prayer song was "Sangam muzhangum thiru Madurai".The standard of Tamil was very good in Madurai district. I met my best friends Srinivasan, Daniel Surendran, Vasudevan, Thangavelu, and Bose there. Gowri, the engineer's daughter, was my best girl friend. We used to sit together in the van and on her request, I wrote her name on all her books/notebooks since my handwriting was good.
I was studying in 6th form in 1956 when I was 11. I was travelling to the school in a blue colour GMC van both in the morning and evening. One by name, Bose was also coming in the same van. His father was working as constable in the police dept. He was a senior, tall, stout and well built. He was arrogant because his father was a policemen. He never called me by my name but only by my caste name [ Iyer,ஐயரே ] and he belonged to a different community. This annoyed me very much. In spite of many requests, he never listened nor bothered. I was apprehensive whether other students would also start calling me like that.
One day, I complained to my father about him. Without understanding my feeling, he advised me not to move with him and to keep away from him. I told him that he was not my classmate nor my friend nor I moved with him. I also told him that in spite of my requests, he continued to call me by my caste and also about my apprehension that other students would follow suit. My father ignored my complaint. However, Bose never stopped calling me by caste. We again had an argument and he asserted that he would call me only like that and I could do whatever I might like to do.
On that evening, after returning from school, I complained to my mother how much I was mentally disturbed and also wondered why father could not warn him. When my father returned home from office at 7 PM, on my behalf, my mother took up the matter with him during dinner. Then my father asked me where Bose's residence was and I told him the location. After dinner, my father washed his hands, put on his shirt, went out and returned after half an hour. I did not know what happened. On the next day, Bose cajoled me and started calling me by my name and not by my caste name.[ஐயரே] In this connection, I have written an article under the caption I HAVE A NAME
I had visited Theni, Kambam, Bodi, Periakulam and other wonderful places. During holidays we used to go to KARADU where we inscribed our names on the rocks. We swam in the big KENI for hours. We ate KODUKKAPULI and walked all the way back to Vaigai Dam as there was no bus in that route. I still remember the OTHTHAI ADI PULIA MARAM on the way where strong winds collected fine sand on the road. I remember making my first solo journey from there to Valady when I was just 7. I had written a detailed article about it in my blog http:/thinkannote.blogspot.
Srinivasan was a good singer. He used to sing the school prayer song. By birth his left ankle was slightly twisted and was limping. Thangavelu belonged to the backward community and was very friendly. We all used to sit together for our lunch and shared it. I always took curd/sambar rice with vegetables, vasu always brought rava upma and Thangavelu brought Kambu Kali or koozhu, a broth like dish. Seenu was local boy and he went home for lunch. We had varieties everyday and we enjoyed our meal to our heart's content. With great difficulty, I located Seenu recently and visited his place in Madurai. He was a retired Head master with two children. His reception was not good and I did not like to resume the lost friendship.
There was Recreation club at the project and I used to play all games. I was an expert in carrom. Daniel Surendran was my best friend at the project. He was short, bulky, wheatish in complexion and jovial. We were always together. We used to pluck the seat cushion from the school van and made foot ball out of it. We ran a hand-written magazine in Tamil called "KALANJIYAM" and circulated to everyone. His parents were getting milk powder from the US, and whenever I went to their house his mother used to give me a large tumbler of milk. Such a wonderful and affectionate lady. Daniel was a great friend and even now I am searching for him. Can anyone locate him for me? When I went to his house, his mother used to clean the fish for cooking by rubbing it on stone to remove the fills. I would sit near her to observe it. She used to chide me for I was a vegetarian. My father used to take us to Periakulam to see movies and also to Kodaikanal. Whenever I was at home, I took coffee in a flask to my father's office at 3 PM . At that time, he used to translate to me the story of "TARZAN" that was published daily in the last page of The Indian Express. In this connection, I have written an article MY DEAR FRIENDS, I MISS YOU
For some, the mother is important. For some, the wife is important. For some, both are important. Funny things happen in our life. We remember some and we forget most of them. An interesting incident happened in our family when I was ten and my father was 39. That showed the quality of my father. My father had lost his father when he was 11. He was brought up by his mother. She had six children of whom my father was the last. She was very strict, orthodox, tonsured her head after the death of her husband, wore only white saree, did pooja and japam daily. No one should touch her until she finished her daily rituals. So my father had lot of love, affection, respect and regard for his mother. To make her happy was one of his life ambitions. He never failed to do anything to make her happy. Taking this to her advantage, my grandmother used to complain about everyone in the family who did not obey her words and got punishment for them.
My father never ate anything outside and when he returned home from office he was hungry as well as angry. The grandmother made her complaints immediately on his return from office so that the punishment was severe. One day my mother became the victim. When the grandmother complained about her, my father got furious, took a stick, held my mother at her wrist, pulled her inside the bedroom and started thrashing her. All the children were bewildered and cursed the grandmother. My mother was screaming inside. After sometime, both of them came out. My mother quietly went into the kitchen and my father threw the stick and sat on the sofa posing tired. At that time, my grandmother said, "Dey Nana, if you hit the pillow hard it would tear away. I know this trick. Your father had done this for me so many times. You can't fool me around". My father was both a devoted son as well as a loving husband. I have written an article under the caption "MOTHER OR WIFE?
I studied upto 8th Form at Andipatti till 1958, when I was 13. In 1958, for 9th and 10th Form [SSLC] my father wanted me to study at Trichy where the standard was better. So I had to move to my grandparents place in Valady village where my elder brother was already studying.I was admitted in E.R.High School, Tiruchy which was one of best schools. There I suffered a lot to learn English.Andipatti was famous for Tamil and Trichy for English.Other students used to envy my proficiency in Tamil. But it was a pathetic experience in the case of English.I have written a separate article about how much I suffered to Learn English in my blog under the caption "LEARNING A LANGUAGE ". At the end of my 9th form, I remember the famous Srirangam Temple fire accident took place.
I remember an incident involving my elder brother. While we were playing, accidentally my brother's first toe nail hit me in my right eye and there was bleeding from the eye. On seeing the blood from my eye my brother started crying aloud. On hearing his cry, my grand parents came rushing. There was no eye doctor in the village. Fortunately, our family Konar [the man who milked our cows] came there and he suggested a medicine. He went home and brought a rooster. He made a small incision near its claw from where blood started oozing. He applied that blood into my eyes. The next day I was alright.
My grand mother had an younger sister living in North Uthara street at Srirangam. She was very fond of her sister. Her name was Valambal and we called her Chithi. Every now and then grandma would go to her sister's help. We also went with her. We used to play with her children Nagarajan, Krishna, Mahalingam and Pattu. My grandmother's father Sri. Mahalinga Jadavallabar died at that time when he was taking bath in coleroon river. It was a different story when her younger sister usurped all the jewels of their mother. My grandmother, heart broken, terminated the relationship once for all and the connection between the two families got cut off permanently.
I used to travel by local train from Valady to Tiruchy town to go to the school and return. We were playing all types of games in the village. My elder brother was my saviour from stronger boys. My younger brother also joined us later and the three of us spent wonderful time with our grandparents. During harvest time we used to go to the fields to supervise harvesting till the produce was brought home and stored. Our grandparents provided us with all types of sweets and snacks, fresh cow's milk etc. I can never forget the love and affection our grandparents showered on us during that period of our life. Our mother was their only daughter and we enjoyed all their love and care. In later days, we reciprocated it by taking care of them till they breathed their last.
I passed the SSLC exam creditably in first class in April 1960. In those days not many people appeared for the exam. The pass percentage was also less. The results came only in the newspaper. The Tamil daily Dhina Thanthi brought special evening edition for the results. People were mad to get the paper. I was content to see the English paper on the next day. I was not worried about my results. I got 360 [60%] as against the state first of 403[67%] My father was happy that I got good marks. That was the first and last occasion he lifted me on his shoulders. One of my friends, Ramani took Adv. English and Commerce in PUC. I wanted to take Adv.English and Economics which were considered to be the toughest. But my father had different ideas. In his life, he wanted to become an engineer but he could not succeed. Hence he wanted at least his sons to become engineers. After SSLC, we had to study one year PUC and then 4 years BE to become an engineer. In PUC, apart from English and Tamil, you had to take four subjects in Group 111, either for medicine or engg. Getting admission into BE/MBBS was very tough in those days. My elder brother was not successful.
A three year diploma course in Engg, after SSLC, [LME, LEE, LCE]was very popular for getting jobs and my father wanted me to do that. And without my liking, he admitted me in Sheshasayee Institute of Tech in Ariyamangalam which was in a remote place, away from the city. Everyday, I had to walk a long distance to reach the institute and I had to carry the "T" square also. I did not know then that it was a high ranking Institute. Somehow, I did not like the course and the institute and slowly slipped in my standard. I guess now, my father wanted me to complete my studies and support the family as early as possible since another brother and sister had come into family making a total of 8 children.
At a tender age of 15, I could not understand my father's problems and I was irresponsible.Due to disinterest, bad friends came along and my studies were ruined. I failed miserably in the 1st two years. By that time, my father was transferred to Tiruchy and on my pleading that I would study well, he gracefully admitted me in PUC in National college in 1962 and then in B.Com degree in St.Joseph's college in 1963. At this time, my last brother was born making the total to nine children. In those days family planning was considered unethical. I have written articles in my blog under the captions "A DAY TO REMEMBER" and "THE THRILL OF ADOLESCENCE"and"THE COURT AND ME" to describe some incidents during my college days.
As I was interested in joining the Indian Army, I took active interest in the NCC. The only notable event in the college was that I represented the NCC in the Republic Day Parade at New Delhi in 1966. I have written an article under the title"ON THIS DAY IN THAT YEAR 1966" For this, I was away from college during Nov65-Jan66 which affected my studies considerably. However, I came out successful in B.com in April 1966 when I was 21. I now regret to say that from the time I passed SSLC till the time I passed BCom, it was the most miserable period of my life. It was fate. From a boy good at studies, I became a bad boy. I got into bad friends, bad habits and got attracted towards cinema. The notable friends were Raju, Gopal, Chandru, and Radha. We had pledged that we shall remain friends forever. But alas, their wives did not cooperate and our friendship came to an end abruptly after their marriage.
My father never gave pocket money. To meet my expenses on friends and cinema, I went for part-time job in the evening after college. Rev.Fr.Mathias, the Principal, gave me a recommendation letter which I am keeping even now. Later, after 34 years, this letter helped me to get admission for my son in Loyola college, Chennai in 1997. During summer vocations, I worked as book representative. I travelled the entire state and visited all the schools with sample books published by Agasthier Book Depot, Tiruchy. Had I listened to my father's words and studied the 3 year diploma course, as I was up to SSLC, my life would have been different and colourful. But you can't escape FATE. No one can change what God has written on the forehead. Even now, I consider it was the greatest mistake I had committed in my life.
The first 21 years were the most crucial period of one's life as it decided the future. I wasted six years completely. Tears rolled down my eyes. How was I going to face the future? Then, I stepped into the next phase of my life, job hunting. There was no scope of continuing education. I had no other option except to go for job. Unless you had good education, getting jobs was not so easy. No one would be ready to hire you. To get a job one must be good at English and should have an Engg degree or Masters. People used to say "apply apply but no reply."
For people who were not successful in education, joining the Services was the another option. With my credentials in the NCC, I wanted to get into the Indian Army. I applied to the SSB for short service commission. I attended the tests and interview at Bangalore. I got both my palms wounded in the rope climbing test. After sometime, I got their telegram advising me about my selection and to report for medical test. At that time, my parents were not willing to permit me to join the Army.
So, I was going on posting applications with no reply. I became frustrated in life. I became one of the unemployed thousands. I did not know what to do. I was keeping my fingers crossed. My elder brother did his M.Sc, joined P&T, did his Grad.ITE[telecom. Engg]. He was working as engineering supervisor, and was supporting the family. All my six younger brothers and sisters were in school. My last brother was just three. I could not understand the difficulties of my father who was supporting a family of 14 including my parents and 3 grandparents., and I was sitting idle at home, roaming the town with friends and seeing cinemas.
I now feel how much my father would have felt in his heart at that time. I feel ashamed and wholeheartedly repent for all my mistakes. I sincerely feel very sorry for not listening to my father's words then. I have written articles in my blog under the captions "ON THE CENTENARY OF MY FATHER" and "MY MOTHER AND ME" to express how important my parents were to me. I was just wondering when I was to prosper in life. O' God, give me PROSPERITY.
We shall continue in PART TWO.
comments
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11:49 PM (8 hours ago)
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It was so nice n I am wondering how you remember so many things happened in your childhood
I can visualize your stories....
I liked the 'cracker' incident.
Please share the rest of the parts
I can visualize your stories....
I liked the 'cracker' incident.
Please share the rest of the parts
Read Bio. I loved the punch line ‘The quality of life is in the living’. I am also April born like you. It is amazing you remember all your friends. Since you told me that you have not shared with very many I was touched and read it right away. There is no better time than today. Kal kare jo aaj, aaj kare jo Ab. Well written and nicely jells as it flows through your forming years. There are resemblances with what my father wrote on his bio. I will humbly disagree with you when you say you wasted your six years. I think life is about experiences. We all did things like bunking lectures and watch movie. But today when I meet my friends, we laugh about it. I did B Sc. In physics and then did my chartered Accountancy. Today I do neither physics nor accounting. But we all do what we feel is important to us. I fell in some stupid infatuation with a girl in 12th grade just after the prelims goofed up my chemistry paper and did not get enough marks for local engineering colleges. That too was an experience I think…Steve Jobs says it, it all manifests somewhere later in life. Serving in military would have been great. I see your love and respect for your parents. That is one unconditional love in life. Keep it coming…….I enjoyed it and if you do not mind I will show it to my father.
Gowri Ramkumar
ReplyDelete12:45 AM (6 hours ago)
to me, Ram
Dear Mama,
Very interesting read.. I could picturize the scenes very well. Very nicely written.
There are lots of little incidents that has such a deep rooted memory in you - fantastic!
I am looking forward to Part Two eagerly,
Love,
Gowri
Ram Ramani
ReplyDelete4:10 AM (2 hours ago)
to me, Gowri
Got a chance to go through both the parts just today. Part 2 is definitely more exciting! Surprised that you remember so many small details in part 1 :) Look forward to part 3.
Regards
ReplyDeleteVijayalakshmi B
Jul 18 (2 days ago)
to me
Dear Anna,
Very nicely written. You have given every detail of your schooling and childhood. Now only , I come to know about your childhood, and other details.
I read the first part to amma, and she was silently listening to all the details. I will read the other two parts soon
With love Viji